wheels on the bus

5:31 PM-- Passengers board the bus, having drank very little all day
to prepare their bladders for the journey. I put my shoes in a plastic
bag and try not to smell my blanket.

6:17 PM-- Hoo, we're flying now! At LEAST 45 mph!

7:21 PM-- Travel Scrabble ceases as it is now too dark to see.

7:59 PM-- All of the food is gone. All of it.

9:33 PM-- Annie really has to go and is considering the funnel option.
Does anyone have an empty water bottle?

10:02 PM-- Rest stop. I squat over a trench behind half a brick wall
and realize I left my T.P. on the bus.

10:37 PM-- Sleeping pill administered.

10:46 PM-- The guy in front of me lights up.

11:15 PM-- The bus isn't moving.

12:01 AM-- Someone's shoulder is in my knee. Still not moving.

2:46 AM-- Where the hey AM I?

2:47 AM-- More importantly, where the hey are my shoes?

2:49 AM-- I miss... rice...

5:30 AM-- Estimated arrival time comes and goes.

6:29 AM-- Rest stop. I find it ironic that I am paying someone actual
money to pee in a hole in the ground. Oh well.

6:40 AM-- Debbie starts singing the Alligator song.

6:40.02 AM-- Debbie stops singing the Alligator song, but the damage
is done. I'll be singing it the rest of the day, if not my life.

7:18 AM-- iPod batteries are dead.

9:26 AM-- That baby is inconsolable. Give it up.

10:17 AM-- We seem to be going through a bus wash. Who knew that
such a thing even existed?

10:56 AM-- Katie finishes Northanger Abbey with her typical impeccable
timing. I don't know how she does it.

11:29 AM-- Actual blessed arrival time. I dig my shoes out of the bag
(no mold that I can see, bonus!) and try not to smell myself.
Guilin/Yangshuo, we have arrived.